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Yu Xi;
TAG ME!
Saturday, September 23, 2006
How can i express myself to myself. How can i know myself. No I dont know myself. Something is awfully wrong with me, I know there is but i just dont know what it is. I feel uncomfortable all the time, after...I dont know as well. I lacked motivation in everything, When i actually tried interacting, it backfired. When i picked my hero in dota, i pressed alt qq instantly. Why? I dont know, i just have an urge to do so. No, not to taunt but to make myself feel better? No it did'nt helped, i felt worse. I have friends who wants to understand me, yet i dont feel comfortable talking to them. I know I have a lot of things to say, but on the other hand I dont know what to say. You see, my life is full of contradictions.
I dont like going out with my parents this few days, because i feel that they are constantly picking on me. No, actually its not feel, THEY ARE picking on me. Serena was right, i have awesomely serious mood swings. And its starting again, You know about PMS? I dont know how it feels, but i know it would be uncomfortable. Lets just say im having a guy's period.
I envied my friends, for them to be together. I feel sucky, i feel like a fucker. Honestly i doubt myself sometimes. I think its overly depressed, Over? I dont know as well.
When Derrick told me about something that happened in his life, I was happy for him but strangely I envied him as well.
Fuck it i dont know what's going on, My heart and my brain are corresponding seriously well , My heart feels uncomfortable then it tells my brain not to tell me why ? Hey fuck you both or i'll seriously sucide with you two.
No, I cant comfort myself. Nothing is helping, Hmm except..
yu xi-de ! 2:55 PM
Chay Yu Xi;
What can i say?
Everybody's changing and I dont feel the same
playing now
_|_
entries;
profile;
shouts;
plugs;
past;
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